A fine line

One of the things I struggle with as a parent is how to keep my girls safe without being too over protective. My girls are still very young but are starting to learn some independence both physically and emotionally. I am finding it hard to go from newborns who depend on me to take care of their every need to toddlers who want to do things on their own and can run off at the speed of lightening. Pie wants to walk when we go to the store now "No cart, Mommy, no cart" she tells me, even though she concedes and rides in the cart when we are getting groceries. Sammie still rides on my back in the Ergo but is starting to fight me when I try and put her in, once she's there she's content to ride along.

I bought both girls the backpack harnesses last week so that they can walk around when we are places that where they could run into the street or get lost in a crowd. Pie really likes hers and we've gotten both looks of disgust and support from other parents who realize that I just want my girls to be safe.

Every time I start to let my guard down a little and get comfortable with my girls gaining independence I hear of something that has me scared to death. In this last week there was a 10 year old boy stabbed to death, along with his father and his friend in northern Maine, and also an attempted kidnapping of a young boy at Old Orchard Beach, while his parents were having a picnic. Luckily the boys father saw what happened and rescued his son in time.

Even though we live in the "safest" state in the country, and I usually don't worry too much about random crime, I still feel the need to never let my girls out of my sight and I'm not sure that feeling will ever go away.

Blessed

Yesterday we went to the local elementary school to play on the playground for a while in the morning. Sammie decided she wanted to climb the ladder to get to the twisty slide but was distracted by two little boys playing near her. I was right there trying to make sure she kept her hands and feet on the bars but she missed the last one, hit her head and fell to the ground before I could even react fast enough to try and catch her. She screamed. I picked her up and looked for blood. Thank God there was none, so we headed over by the parking lot where we found a private place to nurse. Hugs and Kisses are enough for some owies but boobie usually helps when my girls are really upset, scared or hurt. I am so grateful that as a mother I have the ability to offer my children comfort, natural pain relief, a sense of calmness that helps them recover from a traumatic event like she had.

Years before I ever had kids, I'd never gave breastfeeding a second thought. My sister and I grew up during a time when breastfeeding wasn't so popular and being the youngest I never was around very many babies. Bottle feeding formula was what seemed normal to me. When my sister had her children, she (like always) did a lot of research and made very educated decisions as to how she and her husband raised their kids. This was my first exposure to breastfeeding and I saw what a natural beautiful thing it was.

When I was pregnant with Pie, Chris and I knew that we wanted to breastfeed her but everywhere we turned we received negative comments and a serious lack of support. Very few people seemed to have anything positive to say and only gave excuse after excuse as to why they couldn't breastfeed their child and tried to justify why they fed formula. Now I believe every parent has the right to make their own choices when raising their children but I also believe in encouragement and supporting other people even when they choose something different than what I would choose.

Two and a half years later I am still nursing both my girls and intend to let them decide when they are ready to end this part of their childhood. At times I am touched out and it can be frustrating when they fight over who gets which boobie but when they hold hands and giggle so hard they they loose their latch, it makes it all worth it.

I love my girls and this special time we have been blessed with. I am so thankful that my sister showed me how beautiful breastfeeding in and am grateful that I have such an awesome supportive husband who helped me struggle though the rough spots to be able to enjoy this journey with my girls.

New Hampshire

Chris got called to work in New Hampshire for the rest of the summer. We talked about how much we didn't want to spend that much time away from each other and decided that we all would go and have an adventure. So here we are in Farmington, New Hampshire. It's actually been a nice change and we have been able to spend more time with Chris than we have in a long time. Without having to drive so many miles to work each day, we can spend some time with him in the mornings and have 3-4 hours with him at night. It's been a nice change.

On Monday, the girls and I drove to Alton Bay and played at the beach and on Tuesday we found a local elementary school and played on their playground. Both girls amazed me with their monkey climbing skills and their lack of fear. Tonight we are planning on driving to Laconia where they hold a bike rally every year. Unfortunately we missed the rally by only a week. Thursday is supposed to really hot and humid so we will probably find ourselves back at the beach again to try and stay cool, then head  towards home for the weekend to spend some time with Tig and get laundry done. We are supposed to get rain at home today, that will be good for the garden, as long as the rabbit hasn't eaten everything yet.

Ages and Stages

Pie didn't really start talking until she was about 21 months old. I think being a first child and that fact that I just seemed to know what she needed and wanted contributed to her not needing to be verbal. At about 23 months she really started learning more works and now at almost 30 months old is talking in complete sentences and usually using correct grammar, even if she does refer to herself in 3rd person (and as Pie).

I was was a little bit worried about her when hearing other mother's talk about their younger children talking so well. I thought that maybe they were just bragging and counting every little noise their kids made as real words. But she is such a jabber box now, I know there is nothing to worry about at all!

Sammie has really shocked me with how well and how young she has picked up language. I guess having an older sister to keep up with (and tattle on!) has encouraged her to want to communicate. She isn't even 18 months old yet and already speaking in 2 word sentences. She can answer most questions that she's asked and always wants to know where ____ is at. Especially Papa (Grandma and Grandpa!)

It just amazes me at how well and how quickly children learn, even when they learn things you don't want them too.

Little Miss Independent

Pulling her wagon down the driveway, Pie looks over her shoulder and says, "Bye Mom, going shopping. Be back soon."

Blue

When my mom  and dad were here they'd ask Pie and Sam what color is this or that and every time they would say blue. Pie knows most of her colors but blue must be her favorite color.

Last Saturday, Chris built the girls a nice big sandbox. We needed to get it painted this week so it would be all ready for sand next weekend. Chris asked the girls what color they wanted to paint it. Of course they said "Blue!"

So a blue sandbox is what we have. (And blue fingers and toes and hair and....)

Who designs these things anyway?

We have visited quite a few playgrounds in the last couple years and have been surprised at how poorly some of them are designed. When my mom and dad where here visiting we stopped at an older playground that was not very safe for little kids, it had lots of places they they could fall off or fall through. Yesterday we went to one that we had driven by in the past and thought it looked like a really nice playground. It was modern and seemed like it had a lot to do to keep the girls entertained. Pie and Sam both really enjoyed the little kid area. Sam was able to master everything all by herself and was even able to go down the slides without needing anyone to catch her. This jungle gym was made well and seemed safe except for one thing: there was no way for one parent to watch two kids if they were at each end. There also was a bigger kids jungle gym that was about 30 feet from the smaller one. Several older girls tried to lure Pie over to play with them. The was no chance of being able to watch a big kid and a little kid too. I guess some people might think I'm over protective or am a helicopter parent but I don't care. My girls are still really little and it's my job to make sure they are safe no matter where we are. I guess we'll stick to the playgrounds that are parent friendly as well as fun for the kids too.

Broken Flowers

This morning Chris and the girls were outside putting the shade on our new porch swing while I was cooking biscuits and gravy for breakfast. The weather was nice and sunny, a beautiful morning to be outside. The girls were running in and out of the house. Pie came running in and hugged my leg saying something I couldn't understand. I finally got her to let go and repeat what she had said.

"Mommy, I broke your flowers. I sorry."

Oh well, there's always next year to enjoy the flowers.

The Hazards of Summer

I knew it was inevitable. We have so many dandelions and a ton of clover in our grass that attract lots of honey bees. This morning Pie took off running towards her swimming pool and stepped right on a bee. She howled and cried until we got inside and put some "bug spray" on it. She seems to be doing fine now, she's a tough little cookie.

I've been concerned about the girls getting stung because their dad is deathly allergic to bee stings. As a child, he was swarmed and stung many times on his head and neck and ended up in the emergency room in  anaphylactic shock. I've only witnessed him being stung one other time, pretty much the same scenario, and it was so scary.

I know her dad will tell me that she should have shoes on when she's outside, but man, I can't even get her to keep her clothes on how am I supposed to get her to keep shoes on too?

I guess she will just have to understand bee stings are a part of going barefoot in the summer and that she needs to look before she leaps.

New Friends

This spring we have a new friend visiting us. Usually squirrels are discouraged from eating out of bird feeders because they eat all the food and scare all the birds away, but this little guy has become a welcome sight out our window. He has a rather large scar on his side where someone tried to make a meal of him. I think after an ordeal like that he deserves a free lunch. I may even find myself buying him a squirrel feeder of his very own.

Tig is doing really well. He has such a sweet personality and has already proven to be very smart. He is learning what toys he can play with, how to chase a ball, to come, sit, and how to walk on a leash. Today we all walked to the mailbox and he walked right by my side the entire way without pulling one bit. He does need to work on sharing with the other dogs at the food bowl. Fighting over food is absolutely not acceptable. He didn't mind me petting him while he ate but wasn't too fond of Lucy eating along side of him. He will learn, or he will go hungry!

Family Time

Sometimes it's fun to go out on the town, go somewhere new, spend time away from home.

Last night was one of the best nights I can remember and we did none of the above.

After a mostly peaceful supper we all went out and played in the yard. The weather was perfect, warm and sunny with just enough breeze to keep the bugs away. The girls had fun chasing mommy around the swing set and playing ball with daddy. Tig, Lily and Lucy enjoyed the family being outside with them too.

We had so much fun just being silly, I didn't even think about taking pictures but the picture perfect night we had will be burned into my memory for a long time to come.

Mary, Mary Quite Contrary, How Does Your Garden Grow?

After a week of rain, our garden is growing like crazy! The onions are about 6 inches tall and the corn is about 4 inches. The pumpkins have really taken off and the sunflowers are getting huge! We are going to have more peas than I will know what to do with. The beans are a little more sparse but we will still have plenty. My tomato is looking a little bit yellow but after some sunshine this week, I think it will be fine.

Sunflowers

Pumpkins

Tomato

My peony bush that is by the house opened yesterday and the one in the flowerbed opened today. My daises and day lilies have buds on them too!

All this rain also made the grass grow like crazy too. Guess I'll have to mow again this weekend.

Tig

I know I said I wasn't ready, and that I wanted to wait until the girls were older and that I didn't want another puppy but I guess I was wrong.

On Saturday we welcomed Tig into our family.
 He is a 9 week old German Shepherd puppy and I am in love.

Chris and I had been talking for about a year about what kind of dog we'd like to have next and I had suggested a German Shepherd. I had grown up with a Shepherd Collie mix and she was such a great dog. We have had several Pit bulls and while I will always be an advocate for the breed, I wanted to have a different kind of dog for a change. We had talked about going through a rescue to find one but the more we learned about German Shepherds and how they bond, we decided that it would be best for our family to start from the beginning and get a puppy.

We had recently rescued a French Bulldog and she hasn't quite been what we expected. She hasn't bonded with us, and in fact wont even let any of us get close to her. It's one thing to have a 20 pound toothless dog with baggage but I didn't want to risk getting a 80 pound German Shepherd with an attitude.

We talked to several breeders on the phone, one who was the typical 'dog person' that just talked and talked and talked and right away I could tell I didn't want to buy from her. She reminded me of several "breeders" we know that have proven to be very unethical and dishonest. We ended up driving to Houlton, which is about 120 miles north, to buy him from a breeder who didn't try and convince us of his knowledge of the breed. He showed us pictures of many of his puppies and really seemed to know a lot about the dogs without seeming arrogant about being a dog breeder.

I am looking forward to teaching Tig to walk on a leash and general obedience. This is the first time I will have the time to really work with one of our puppies full time. Pie has already been put in charge of toy duty, making sure Tig learns what toys he can play with and what he can't. She has proven to be a great helper.

Skinny Dippin

My little hippy chick would rather be naked than wear clothes. She did really well while my parent were here and stayed dressed the entire time but now that they have left, she's back to her natural roots. It's been pretty rainy the last few days but today has been dry and we even had some sunshine for awhile so we ended up in the pool. Of course, Pie went skinny dippin!

Saying goodbye

Yesterday we had to make a very tough decision. Our 12 year old pit bull Hula has been in poor health for a couple months now. She came home one day limping, we gave her a few days to see of she had just pulled a muscle or hurt a toe, but she kept getting worse. We took her to the vet and he diagnosed her with a torn ACL.  He said it could take six to eight weeks to heal and to just keep her comfortable. She kept getting worse and worse, her good leg started to get weak and she lost weight quickly. At this point we knew that she was not going to get better and had to decide if her quality of life was still there or not. Yesterday we decided that she was in too much pain and that it was better for her to go to heaven to be with the rest of her dog friends. It was such a hard decision but I hope we kept her from suffering any more than she had too.

Chris and I had been married about 2 years when he told me he wanted to get a pit bull. We already had CJ, a healer cross and Hoffa, a rottweiler. I had never had experience with pit bulls and was a little nervous since I only knew their reputation. I think my mom and dad felt the same way when we told them too.

Chris found an add in the paper for pit bull puppies and we brought home Yeager. I was instantly in love. Yeager was the most unique dog I have ever met. He was sweet and loving, got along with everyone he met, animal and human alike but was very independent too. As long as he had his favorite toy he was happy as could be. Some of his favorite toys were a 12 pound bowling ball that he could carry around the farm in his mouth, a 2 foot long, 3 inch wide "stick" that he chewed in half and of course he met his match with the "kong'. He could chew for hours and hours. One day Chris and my dad went duck hunting and shot a duck that landed on the frozen pond. Neither of them wanted to venture out on the ice but with a few thrown rocks Yeager brought the duck back gently in his mouth and dropped it at Chris's feet. At that point my dad was won over. We lost Yeager in Novemeber of 2005 to liver cancer.

A couple years after Yeager came into our lives,  we met some people who also had pit bulls and were about to have a litter of puppies. We got first pick when they were born. We wanted a female to give Yeager a wife. Within a few weeks we brought Hula home. She found her place in the pack perfectly. Hula was just the sweetest dog, she always stepped back and let the other dogs eat first then went in for the left overs. I don't think in her 12 years that I ever saw her curl a lip or growl at anyone or anything.

Hula was about 10 years old when Pie was born. I wasn't sure what she would think since she had never been around children before. She wasn't too thrilled about tiny puppies so I was a bit nervous but she proved to be such a great friend to them. As the girls got bigger, Hula got more attention than I think she knew what to do with. She let them wrestle on her, hug and kiss her, dress her up in bunny ears, cover her up with blanket and play peek-a-boo. She would just lick their faces and loved their hugs. I am so grateful that she welcomed Pie and Sam into our pack too.

Now we are left with Lily the weenie dog and Lucy, the french bulldog who hates everyone. I know that I will want another big dog again but right now it's too soon and there is just no way to replace the incredible dog that was Hula.

July 2, 1998 - June 3, 2010